CheeseDoodles and Other Misunderstandings

Happy ________ day!

The other day, as I was driving through town, an SUV pulled in front of me that had a grimy back window. Someone had scrawled in the dust one word. VAGINA.

I remember when it was thought clever to scribble WASH ME on a dirty car, but why would someone inscribe vagina on the back window of a car?

I think some terms should be known but not spoken. Or in this case, advertised. I’m pretty sure that if I had a dollar for every time I’ve said vagina out loud, I would have less than a dollar.

Vagina isn’t a dirty word. It’s just a kind of private word. Not something to come up in ordinary conversation unless you’re a doctor. It’s even kind of clinical. Not at all nasty or kinky. Definitely an odd choice for dust graffiti.

I know that people are always trying to drum up interest in whatever cause they believe in. They run races, volunteer for dunk-tanks, ask for Facebook likes, spend time in pretend jail. They use all kinds of social media to point a big arrow at the band wagon they want you to jump on. Maybe someone had used the old school  social media of a dirty window. So, I thought, “Maybe it’s Vagina Awareness Day. Not that I’ll celebrate.”

Once I got home, I looked on nationaldaycalendar.com, and nothing was listed for vagina. There was National Nude Day, National Tape Measure Day, and National Static Electricity Day, among many others. Imagine the greeting card for that:

HAPPY STATIC ELECTRICITY DAY!
HOPE THE DAY SPARKS YOUR CREATIVITY,
BUT NOTHING TOO SHOCKING.

In my research, I actually found something on the calendar I can get behind. I’ve decided to let my car’s rear window get good and dirty, and on September 19, I’ll write, “Arrgh!” In honor of “Talk Like a Pirate Day”.

Celebrate!

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One thought on “Happy ________ day!

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